OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
