fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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