yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
My vagina just recognized that song.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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