he thought i was a dude.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
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how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
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Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
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