Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Randomize