hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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