tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Randomize
