So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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