due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Man, jail baloney is awful.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
