how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I think i peed on brittanys purse
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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