Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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