Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
