Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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