He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
