i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
