I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
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He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
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Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
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