I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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