The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Randomize
