Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize