I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize