what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Randomize
