You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
