i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize