please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Is this like a preordered booty call?
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
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