so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
