apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Randomize
