Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize