Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
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