we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
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