There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
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