I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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