Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
