we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
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Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
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He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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