Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
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when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
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I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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