Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.