dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
this hospital has no fireball
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize