This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
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