I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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