States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
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