we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
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I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
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