So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
