Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
His hands were made for my vagina.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
