I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
