i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Randomize
