Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
