I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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