It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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