I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
