I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
