I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
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