they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
